Ladies & gents, hobos & tramps, bug-eyed mosquitoes & bowlegged ants! I’m going to tell you a story you’ve never heard before, so pull up a chair & sit on the floor. Admission is free, so pay at the door.

One fine day, in the middle of the night, 2 dead boys got up to fight. Back to back, they faced each other, drew their swords & shot each other. A deaf cop heard the shot & saved the lives of the 2 dead boys.

If you don’t believe my lies are true, ask the blind man, he saw it too.