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Uncategorized Text Messages

A collection of Uncategorized text messages and SMS quotes

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Text Message 9158: A true friend

“a true friend is a person who makes your life better.”
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Text Message 9157: Sheep don’t talk, my friend

What did the late yasser arafat say to former president bill clinton? > > > > > “sheep don’t talk, my friend.”
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Text Message 9156: Nay, pinapatawag kayo sa school namin

Isang estudyante umuwi ng bahay (galit na galit) anak: nay! pinapatawag kayo sa school namin. nanay: anak bakit? siguro may ginawa kang kalokohan! anak: ayos ah! kayo nge etong pinapatawag eh.
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Text Message 9155: When you develop the ability to listen

When you develop the ability to listen to anything unconditionally without losing your temper or self-confidence, it means you got or are. . . married!;-)
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Text Message 9154: Bawal daw kumain ng manok

Anak: nay, bawal daw kumain ng manok kapag araw ng mga patay. nanay: at cno naman ang nagsabi sayo nyan? anak: yung tindera ng baboy.:-d
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Text Message 9153: Your first job

A young guy, hired by a supermart, reported for his 1st day of work. the manager greeted him with a warm handshake & a smile, gave him a broom & said, “your 1st job will be to sweep out the store.” “but i’m a college graduate,” the guy replied angrily. “oh, i’m sorry. i didn’t […]
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Text Message 9152: PH as the official acronym of the country

The dept. of foreign affairs announced recently that the government has adopted ph as the official acronym of the country. but dfa denied rumors that the country’s official motto will likewise be changed from the original “maka-diyos, maka-tao, makakalikasan at makabansa” to simply… “ph cares.”:-*
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Text Message 9151: Difference between a rifle and a machine gun

“dad, what is the difference between a rifle and a machine gun?” “a rifle and a machine gun can be compared to myself and your mother. while i can say a few words at a time, your mother can speak for an hour.”;-)
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Text Message 9150: Why give food to a beggar who you don’t know?

Husband: “why did you give food to a beggar who you don’t know? he did not do anything for you.” wife: “no reason. it’s just a pleasure to have my cooking appreciated for a change.”
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Text Message 9149: Little boy protests his mother’s favoritism

A little boy notices his mother always buys new clothes for his sister, but never for him. he protests his mother’s favoritism. she explains, “we must pay special attention to packaging, especially of things that we are sending for export.”
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Text Message 9148: Know how to humble yourself down

“the most important thing in life is when you know how to humble yourself down.. even when everybody is looking up to you..” have a nice day!
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Text Message 9147: I gave you a diamond watch

Boy: i gave you a diamond watch. why are you still late and let me wait so long? gal: because on the way i only saw the diamonds and did not see the time!;-)
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Text Message 9146: I saw you and your wife sawing wood

“i am very glad that you and your wife have made up.” “what? no, we will never make up.” “then why did i see you together sawing wood yesterday?” “we were diving the furnitures!”
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Text Message 9145: Beryang at Toyang

“sino ang pinakamatandang tao sa buong mundo?” “si milanyo.” “bakit?” “mil ano, di ba? isang libong taon.” “e, sino naman ang pinakabata?” “si beryang at toyang.” “bakit na naman?” “beri young at too young, gets mo?”
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Text Message 9144: Celebrate the great feasts of All Saints & All Souls

Quotes: faith enables the believing soul to treat the future as present and the invisible as seen. – j. oswald sanders. as we celebrate the great feasts of all saints & all souls, may our souls rest like docile lambs in the palm of god’s hand, reposing there in confidence that all our concerns for […]

A collection of Uncategorized text messages and SMS quotes