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Uncategorized Text Messages

A collection of Uncategorized text messages and SMS quotes

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Text Message 8903: Are you prepared spiritually?

Before baptism: priest: baptism is a serious step. are you prepared for it? erap: yes father. i have prepared appetizers & we have a caterer coming w/plenty of food for all of our friends. priest: i don’t mean that. i mean, are you prepared spiritually? erap: oh, sure! i’ve got beer & whiskey.
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Text Message 8902: Fen Reliever

Boy: pabili nga ng alaxan fr. girl: ilan? boy: isa lang, ay ano po ba ibig sabihin ng fr? girl: ahhm, kwan fen reliever!:-*
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Text Message 8901: Sino sa kanila ang magbabayad?

Nurse: dok, nasa labas po yung pasyente nyong may split personality! doc: naisahan na ako nyan, tanong mo muna kung cno sa kanilang dalawa ang magbabayad!
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Text Message 8900: Life is a hole

Life is a hole. bakit?!?. . . kasi ~ nakakahinga tayo dahil sa butas, ~ nakakain tayo dahil sa butas, ~ nabubuhay tayo dahil sa butas at ~ kapag namatay tayo diretso sa butas!%-) o, say mo? hehe..
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Text Message 8899: Presidential Calendar

Presidential calendar: sept. 28: returned to rp. distributed a bar of chocolate each to his sisters, and a “secret gift” (read:wala) to his girlfriend. sept. 29: shalani denied rumored breakup with p-noy. (may alam ba kayo?) sept. 30: (almost) excommunicated! (di pa man nakakasal, excommunicated na. patay tayo dyan!) oct. 1: palace spokesman gave p-noy […]
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Text Message 8898: Is it ok if she carries a golf bag?

A lamaze class was in full swing. the instructor was teaching the women how to breathe properly, along with advising men on how to give the necessary assurances at this stage of the plan. the instructor then said, “ladies, exercise is good for you. walking is esp. beneficial. and, gents, it wouldn’t hurt you to […]
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Text Message 8897: Poof! She became a husband

A wife at a wishing well: “i wish for no house work, no cooking, no cleaning, no washing and live a relaxed life.” poof!!! she became a husband! 😀
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Text Message 8896: Now that we are older

Our generation never get a break. when we were young they taught us to respect our elders. now that we are older, they taught us to listen to the youth of the country!!! ;-(
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Text Message 8895: It is better to be single

“it is better to be single yet inspired, than to be in a relationship yet confused.” so true.
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Text Message 8894: Don’t do to others, what we did last night

Motto ng magsyota: “don’t do to others.. .. what we did last night!” hahaha
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Text Message 8893: Manny & Jinkee hinold-up

Sina manny & jinkee namamasyal, hinold-up! binigay ni manny ang wallet niya, nagalit si jinkee…. jinkee: bakit di mo man lang sinuntok? manny: jinkee, ang laman ng wallet ko ay 10k lang…. alam mo naman na hindi ako lumalaban kapag hindi milyon no !!! :p
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Text Message 8892: Time is life. Enjoy it

Time is definitely more precious than money, and there is nothing common between them. you can’t accumulate time. you can’t borrow time. you can nevertell how much time you have left in the bank of life. time is life. enjoy it.
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Text Message 8891: Your wife will be 180kms away from you

If your wife is getting fat, let her walk 3kms in the morning and 3kms in the afternoon. by the end of the month she will be 180kms away from you. odiba?
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Text Message 8890: Ang Tuwid na Daan

Ex comm brouhaha: cbcp president bishop nereo odchimar has denied saying that p-noy may be excommunicated. he insisted his statement was “taken out of context” and “blown out of proportion” by the media. hmm, is odchimar, a secret member of the presidential communications group? in view of excommunication threat hanging on p-noy’s head, malacanang has […]
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Text Message 8889: I’ll never understand women

A man’s perspective: i know i’m not going to understand women. i’ll never understand how you can take boiling hot wax, pour it onto your upper thigh, rip the hair out by the root, and still be afraid of a spider.

A collection of Uncategorized text messages and SMS quotes