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Uncategorized Text Messages

A collection of Uncategorized text messages and SMS quotes

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Text Message 11762: Behind every successful man

Quote: some people say, “behind evry successful man there is a woman” but nobody knows the fact that “women choose only successful men.” hahaha
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Text Message 11761: Let me call you back

Woman buys a new sim, puts it in her phone and thought of surprising her husband who is in the living room. she goes to the kitchen and calls her husband, “hello, darling!” the husband, in hush tones, replies, “let me call you back, honey, the dumb lady is in the kitchen.”
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Text Message 11760: Great meatloaf recipe

Overheard conversation of two women at a supermarket: “i have a great meatloaf recipe to share with you. all i have to do is mention it, & my husband says, ‘lets eat out.'”
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Text Message 11759: How does the next Bourne movie end?

Q. how does the next bourne movie end? a. after wiping out all his enemies on edsa, quiapo and san andres… he waits for the smoke to clear. then surveys all the dead bodies…cocks his gun…looks strait into the camera and sez: ‘ its more fun in the philppines !
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Text Message 11758: Fear not

Fear is the darkroom where negatives are developed.. fear not! have a bright and sunny sunday!
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Text Message 11757: The truth will only hurt you once

“a lie will hurt you a thousand times, the truth will only hurt you once.”
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Text Message 11756: Bawal pumunta sa ilalim ng mesa

Holy cow restaurant: isang babae at isang lalake kumakain.. maya-maya napansin ng waiter na unti-unting dumadausdos ang babae hanggang nawala sa ilalim ng mesa. waiter: excuse me sir, bawal po yan.. pumunta sa ilalim ng mesa ang mrs. nyo. lalake (dedma): hindi… ayan sya papasok pa lang sa pinto ng resto.
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Text Message 11755: Never Laugh At Your Wife’s Choices

Two wise advices never laugh at your wife’s choices… you are one of them.. never be proud of your choices… your wife is one of them..
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Text Message 11754: Go green, eat chicken!

Attention vegetarians! chicken never give us oxygen nor shade. chicken never cause global warming and climate change, then why eat plants and trees? go green, eat chicken!
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Text Message 11753: Half of eight

At a math class teacher: what is half of eight? student: it depends, if we divide it horizontally, we will get 0 or if we divide it vertically, we will get 3!
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Text Message 11752: Not good to talk while eating

Girl: i wana tell u smthing, boy: it’s not good to talk while eating.. after eating, boy: now tell me girl: there was a cockcroach in what you ate..
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Text Message 11751: A girl remembers everything

Be careful on what you say, a girl remembers everything. 🙂
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Text Message 11750: Faithful dog

A man is selling his dog. a potential buyer asked, “is this dog faithful?” the man replied, “there’s no doubt about it! i sold it thrice, and everytime, he goes back to me.”
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Text Message 11749: Deleted

Deleted
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Text Message 11748: Dont start your day with a negative attitude

Don’t start your day with a negative attitude. it’s hard to understand why so many people wake up each morning defeated when each day holds so much potential. the possibilities that today offers are endless, so eagerly anticipate wonderful happenings. it’s easy to let blessings go by unnoticed.. have a sunny day!

A collection of Uncategorized text messages and SMS quotes